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Do Elevator Disco...
Announce in a demonic
voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
Crack open your
briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in
there?"
Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act
embarrassed when they open by themselves.
On the top floor, try
and whiz down the thin slot between the doors and listen to the Niagara falls
Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to
call you "Admiral".
On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you
hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
Wave hands wildly at
invisible flies buzzing around your head.
Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
Shave.
Stare, grinning, at
another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks
on!"
When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now...
motion sickness!"
Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.
Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.
Start a sing-along.
When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your
beeper?"
Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other
passengers that this is your personal space.
Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"
While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it. quick!" then
whistle innocently.
Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say
"oops!"
Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of
THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
Leave a box between the doors.
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